Blue Monday, PDX!
In my head I imagine the formatted interchange between an airline pilot and the nearest air traffic control center, "Wall Street Center" (WSC). The aircraft's registration is NDJIA (per NATO practice: November-Delta-Juliet-India-Alpha). Of course, those letters could also stand for "newest Dow-Jones Industrial Average". Think about it...
NDJIA: Uh, Wall Street Center, November Delta Juliet India Alpha is with you.
WSC: India Alpha, have you radar contact. Confirm heading.
NDJIA: Uh, Wall Street, India Alpha heading south, one-eight-zero degrees, and requesting lower.
WSC: Negative, India Aplha, ascend and maintain ten-thousand, one-zero thousand.
NDJIA: Uh, Wall Street, unable to ascend, sir. Unable to ascend to one-zero and unable to maintain current.
WSC: India Alpha, maintain current altitude. Will divert other traffic. State your current
NDJIA: Uh, Wall Street... Uh, India Alpha is out of eight thousand and passing through seven.
WSC: India Alpha, urgent you maintain seven thousand.
NDJIA: Unable, Wall Street. India Alpha unable to maintain seven. Leaving seven for six.
WSC: India Alpha, state altitude you are able to maintain.
NDJIA: Uh, Wall Street, losing power. All engines out and restart unsuccessful. Mayday! Mayday!
WSC: India Alpha, state altitude you are able to maintain. (silence)
WSC: India Alpha, state altitude you are able to maintain, sir. (repeats several times, no
11:56:32 GMT: radar contact is lost, transcript ends
So, kiddos. My advice for 2009: Don't open your IRA, 401K statements. Save the paper and use it as fire starter material.
Oh, one more thing. Double your garden space. Stores jammed with food may be hard to come by, come August. Stores may be hard to come by. Jobs may be harder to come by.
What are you gonna eat? Far fetched? I don't think so.
Double your garden space at the beginning of the season. Come August it will be far too late. You read it here first.